Its been 1 month, 2 weeks and 4 days since I graduated, not that I’m counting and I am now officially a graduate. I recently received my £27,000+ piece of paper last week and my graduation photo is nicely framed and mounted on the wall, alongside my other well established, academic siblings – all feels very well and proper does it not?
Except 2 rejections later, mini breakdowns happening here, there and everywhere and a fairly average waitress job just doesn’t cut it for me. At times the world genuinely feels like it is caving in on me and I haven’t even started yet. I watch days pass by, I do the same thing everyday, get up, go to work, come home, go to bed, repeat. Being knocked back twice has made me feel useless and has given me little motivation to try again.
It wasn’t till earlier this week I felt like I hit rock bottom. Oh my goodness, things just felt like they were going from bad to worse. I was literally having a melt down because I had no idea what to do next, what is the best step for me next, how others might react to my plans, what others want me to do, where I should be, how I should tell people. The list goes on and on.
I don’t care how much or little of this you accept but stop and listen up. As for others if you if you’re a little stuck at the moment, unsure about where to go next or just need a little pick me up, please also listen up.
You may feel as if some days you have conquered your day and other days you may wish you never existed. But this fluctuation is a good thing, don not see it as bad. It is an important step in building yourself and building your journey and to making decisions and doing actions which make you the person you want to become.
For some you may have made it past one of the biggest hurdles already and smashed your university degree and produced work which you’re proud of and know was made with passion and a strong intention. You’ve stayed humbled from the praise your work has received and the criticism you’ve embraced.
Alice, as for the job application knock backs, it’s 2 applications out of about 100+ you’re probably going to apply for. Embrace them. Criticism and rejection is one of the greatest tools of developing yourself and building yourself as it teaches you to improve and encourages you to work harder for what you want. Go out, apply for jobs, don’t be afraid of what could go wrong, focus on what could go right because when you get accepted it will most certainly be for the right reason and the best suited for you.
Aside from that I know many of you, and Alice especially you, are not staring at a blank canvas, I know there is a million and one ideas bubbling inside you and I know how much you want to start building them. But right now, enjoy this moment. Enjoy this moment of being able to work, play and save. Alice enjoy this moment of being able to spend everyday in a beautiful location with your boyfriend which you’ve so longed for and enjoy this moment of believing you can do what you think is impossible, because you’ve already crossed one of the hardest bridges.
Guys, please don’t think about what others have accomplished, don’t think about others who have maybe got a job in a company, or who are studying another degree, or who have everything planned out. When the time is right, you too will know what to do and where to go. Don’t see yourself as falling behind because each and every one of us lives according to the pace of our own clock. Be patient but push on. Spend your days being creative, kind and productive. Dont let the fears and excuses hold you back because now is your time to be and do who and what you want. Be the best and happiest you for you.